tennis and drawing (unrelated)

1. that federer-nadal match on sunday was epic. sometimes i had to cover my eyes because of the suspense! oh, nadal was so close to clinching it in the fourth! i really wanted federer to win – he’s such a classy guy. that said, i was happy for nadal, who humbly said in adorably broken english that he felt proud because he won against “best in the history.” what amazing athletes. what great sportsmanship. what a great match.

2. this is pretty much the first drawing i’ve made since high school.

some of my drawings and paintings from high school are hanging around the house, and one of my mom’s daycare parents saw them and asked me to draw her kids. i said yes mostly to be nice, even though she’s paying me. it had been six years, and i wasn’t sure whether i was still capable of it.

it felt strange, though. when you’re drawing something like this – a portrait which should resemble its subject – it takes time. it’s a process of trial and error trying to get the lines just right. you draw one, look at the big picture to see if it works, and then either erase and start again or move on to the next line. it’s a time-consuming process, trying to get your fingers to replicate the details your eyes see. in fact, it’s a process that defies any time limit. you could allot a few hours to work on it, but there’s no saying how long it could take. in this sense, committing yourself to drawing something like this feels like a rebellion against the busy, fully scheduled, multitasked days this modern world requires. working on a drawing means i’m giving up time that could be spent learning about what’s going on on the other side of the world. it means i’m postponing a check of my email inbox. it requires a focus that muffles thoughts of the outside world, and because of that, it’s kind of therapeutic.

after realizing this, i got to wondering how i had managed to go so long without drawing. i never really drew outside of class in high school. i guess it was enough for me to have the talent; i didn’t feel like i had to actually use it. (maybe because everyone at trinity was so talented, being able to draw felt commonplace?)apparently when carolyn’s mom told my mom that i was doing a couple drawings for her, my mom said, “oh good, you got her to do that again!” and now that i think about it, i can’t help but feel the same way. it’s reflective of a larger realization i’ve had recently, a realization that took way too long time to come to me. it’s not what you can do that matters in life – it’s what you do do that matters. clearly, the lesson behind “this little light of mine” didn’t sink in despite singing that song and hearing the parable countless times growing up.

anyway, i’ve resolved to draw more often. i’m thinking that drawings of the three boys i nanny might make a good going-away present for the family when i stop working for them in august/september.